Visit #13: Sunday, June 29, 2014: 5:19 PM

Burritos, burritos, so many burritos.  At the end of my last post I took stock of what remained of my Live Mas adventure.  While I concluded that less than 50% of the Taco Bell menu lay ahead of me, unfortunately much of the uncompleted portion of the menu appears to be inhabited by my principal nemesis, the burrito.  As avoidance will get me no closer to my ultimate goal, onwards we go, dear reader.

Item #31:  COMBO BURRITO

By my count, there are no fewer than 12 principal varieties of burrito on offer at the Border:

I have conquered the following burritos thus far (in chronological order):

1.  Cheesy Potato Burrito

2.  Smothered Burrito

3.  Bean Burrito

4.  Steak & Egg Burrito (breakfast)

5.  Burrito Supreme

6.  Beefy 5-Layer Burrito

On this visit:

7.  Combo Burrito

Yet to come:

8.  Cantina Burrito

9.  7-Layer Burrito

10.  Black Bean Burrito

11.  Fresco Burrito Supreme

12.  XXL Grilled Stuft Burrito

That is a lot of fucking burritos.

The official Taco Bell website description for the Combo Burrito:

"A warm, soft flour tortilla loaded with a double portion of seasoned beef filled with hearty beans, onions, real cheddar cheese, and tangy red sauce."

Price:  $2.19

Taste:  7.5 (out of 10)

Value:  6.5 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  7.3 (out of 10)

I have to confess that at this point all of the burritos are starting to run together a little bit in my Taco Bell consciousness.  I did not notice a large difference between the Combo burrito and the Beefy 5-Layer Burrito, even though the Combo Burrito cost nearly $1.00 more.  If anything, the flavor was a bit more on the bland side here.  And while the Taco Bell website claims a double portion of beef in the Combo Burrito, I didn't find it to be appreciably more filling than the Beefy 5-Layer Burrito.

Also, this is one of the seemingly random menu items where chopped onions make an appearance.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason that determines where these things are included.  They do add an interesting crunch here and there, but not much in the way of flavor.  This could easily be remedied by using red onions instead of white onions.  But I won't hold my breath on this one.

The bottom line:  There is little to distinguish the Combo Burrito from the rest of Taco Bell's burrito lineup.

Item #32:  MOUNTAIN DEW BAJA BLAST FREEZE

I managed to get a fair amount of sunburn working outdoors yesterday.  Sunburn sucks.  I didn't get too sunburnt yesterday, but I think I still might rather have a cold than sunburn.  (Of course, if I had a cold, I would probably say that I would rather have sunburn.)  Plus, it was roughly 85 degrees with 85% humidity all day yesterday and today.  All of which is to say that my skin is on fire and my body thermostat is set to "HEAT" for the time being.  I thought, "Why not try an ice cold beverage?"

The website description:

"The Mountain Dew Baja Blast Freeze is a refreshing frozen soft drink with the flavor and energy of Mountain Dew and a blast of tropical lime."

Price:  $2.09

Taste:  8.0 (out of 10)

Value:  7.0 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  7.8 (out of 10)

I am not a big frozen drink guy.  Give me a cold beer over a margarita any day of the week.  But this one tasted surprisingly good.  The frozen texture still managed to allow for a fair bit of carbonation, which was a nice surprise.  Having said that, however, the Mountain Dew Baja Blast Freeze (that's a mouthful of name right there) didn't really taste much like Mountain Dew or tropical lime.  (Is there such a thing as a non-tropical lime?)  But it was a nice change of pace on an extremely warm day.

Item #33:  BLACK BEANS AND RICE

There is a trio of side dishes available at Taco Bell that I never even knew existed prior to my Live Mas adventure.  Each of these side dishes come in a dish/bowl type of container.  The first is Black Beans and Rice, which I tried tonight.  Also available are Pintos & Cheese, and the Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes.  Can you guess which one of the three I expected to consume sans cheese?  I will give you a hint, dear reader:  that's right, the one that didn't have cheese in its name.

The website description:

"Premium Latin rice topped with flavorful black beans."

Price:  $1.49

Taste:  7.0 (out of 10)

Value:  6.0 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  6.8 (out of 10)

First of all, let me say this:  the Black Beans & Rice on offer from the Border did not taste bad.  It was pretty much what I expected.  Except for one thing:  there was a pretty substantial layer of cheese on top of the beans and rice.  (See official Taco Bell description above; note that there is absolutely no mention of cheese.)  This layer of cheese is plainly visible in the picture above.  This cheese did not impart a strong, cheesy flavor, however; it mainly served to help smooth out what could be a rather fibrous texture if the beans and rice were left to their own devices.

My bottom line for Taco Bell's Black Beans and Rice:  It was filling, but not extraordinary from a flavor perspective.  I do have a slight problem paying $1.49 for a menu item that does not include any meat.  And the inclusion of the rather heavy cheese layer does pretty much disqualify any claims that this menu item might have to "healthy alternative" status.  But it still does offer an "off-the-beaten-path" quality that may appeal to some.

Bonus:  it comes with a spork.

My receipt for tonight's meal:

Keep it real, my peeps.

Visit #12: Wednesday, June 18, 2014: 5:52 PM

It has been my experience that when a fast food chain "introduces" a new menu item -- especially a specialty item that claims to be an entirely new culinary invention -- the result invariably feels forced and tastes like...disappointment.  Taco Bell's latest advertising push following the introduction of their breakfast menu has been geared around the "Quesarito."  As tonight's installment of my Live Mas adventure was to revolve around the Quesarito, I didn't particularly like the odds of me having a positive dining experience.  

Item #29:  STEAK QUESARITO

I have been on the record as giving Taco Bell's inclusion of rice in various menu items less-than-exemplary marks.  So when I learned that rice was a component of Taco Bell's new Quesaritos, it really lowered my expectations.  New menu item that feels contrived + rice = probably pile of sadness.  But here goes nothing...

The official Taco Bell website description:

"The new Quesarito is the best of quesadilla and tortilla rolled into one.  It's filled with marinated steak, premium Latin rice, Chipotle sauce, reduced-fat sour cream, and then wrapped up in a grilled quesadilla loaded with melted cheeses."

Price:  $2.99

Taste:  9.0 (out of 10)

Value:  8.0 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  8.8 (out of 10)

Wow.  I haven't been this completely wrong about having negative expectations for a Taco Bell menu item since the day that I ordered the Waffle Taco.  The Quesarito is simply delicious.  First of all, the Chipotle sauce adds the perfect amount of heat.  Second of all, it's almost flawless texturally -- the steak, grilled quesadilla, and rice provide nice contrasts.  (I do fear that the whole package might not shine as much has I ordered the ground beef version rather than steak.)  The grilled flavor of the quesadilla was just as tasty as when I ordered the Chicken Quesadilla.

Another plus:  it comes in a premium-feeling foil wrapper.  (See first picture above.)  I drove about 25 minutes after picking up the Quesarito at the drive thru window before eating it.  It was still piping hot and very fresh.  This foil wrapper is a nice touch.  Another positive:  this is a nice volume of food for $2.99.  Very filling and satisfying.  All in all, well done, Taco Bell.

And now, time for dessert.

Item #30:  BROWNIE SANDWICH

I actually picked up a Brownie Sandwich on my previous visit to Taco Bell about 48 hours earlier.  I glanced at it quickly that day and it appeared to be a pre-made and pre-packaged concoction similar to a typical Little Debbie snack.  After finishing my Quesarito, I examined the pre-purchased chocolate treat in more detail.

Upon further handling, the package was not vacuum-sealed like a factory-made product would be.  It was in a plastic sleeve sealed with a little sticker.  This seal could not have been air tight, however, so at this point I uttered "Oh shit," and figured I was in for some stale pastry fare.  For better or worse, I opened it up and took a bite.

From the Taco Bell website:

"Two delicious triangle-shaped brownies with creamy fudge frosting filling in between."

Price:  $1.29

Taste:  8.0 (out of 10)

Value:  7.5 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  7.9 (out of 10)

And amazingly, it wasn't stale at all.  It was soft and pillowy.  The icing that forms the "meat" of the sandwich wasn't too sweet either.  There were little pieces of embedded hard chocolate in the brownies themselves that were a nice touch.  And it was almost too large for me to finish after consuming the Quesarito.  In my opinion, Taco Bell did not screw this one up from a taste/value perspective.

My one quibble about this menu item would be this:  it would appear to be the only menu item on Taco Bell's entire menu that is entirely devoid of their quasi-Mexican influence.  Perhaps that is a minor detail, but it seems like a little bit of a sellout.

The receipt:

**We have now hit the 30-menu-items consumed milestone.  By my approximate count, I have 24 menu items remaining.  (More than halfway home!)  This does not include all of the possible variations of each menu item; for instance, many tacos and burritos are available in beef, chicken, and steak varieties.  I am generally consuming only one iteration of each menu item for my Live Mas Adventure.**

Visit #11: Monday, June 16, 2014: 6:12 PM

I dined in at Taco Bell on this visit.  When it is relatively uncrowded (based on a cursory parking lot analysis) inside the restaurant, this really is the way to go.  It is remarkable how much better I have found The Border's food to taste when consuming it just 5 or 10 minutes before I otherwise would have had I resorted to ordering through the drive thru window.

But as luck would have it, shortly after walking into the restaurant, the skies outside blackened, and some truly biblical weather ensued.  This kept any additional potential patrons from entering the restaurant -- a definite plus -- but it was a little unsettling when the lights began to flicker a bit and the thunder grew so loud that I felt it transmitting into my body from my hard plastic chair.  Also, I was trapped for a few minutes after I got done eating.  Oh well.

(You may notice from my receipt that I purchased a Brownie Sandwich along with the two other items from tonight's meal that I am reviewing below.  For reasons unknown -- perhaps my concern at being swept away in a tornado was to blame -- my appetite was not at its peak on this particular evening.  The thought of attacking the Brownie Sandwich after already eating a sizable portion of food was not an appealing one, so I reserved it to consume after my next Taco Bell meal.  I will provide the review for the Brownie Sandwich in that meal's post.)

Item #27:  BEEFY 5-LAYER BURRITO

I have been on the record as saying that in general, Taco Bell's burritos have been the most disappointing category of Border cuisine.  Tonight gave me a bit more hope.  And as any person with their salt knows:  "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies."  Tonight's burrito selection:  the Beefy 5-Layer Burrito.

The official Taco Bell website description:

"Layers of seasoned beef, beans, real cheddar cheese and cool reduced-fat sour cream all wrapped in a flour tortilla with a special layer of warm nacho cheese sauce."

Price:  $1.29

Taste:  8.0 (out of 10)

Value:  9.5 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  8.4 (out of 10)

Sometimes the best addition is a subtraction.  The subtraction that I am referring to in this instance is rice.  Rice in and of itself does not a bad burrito make.  But I do feel like it makes the proper flavor/texture balance more difficult to achieve.  Everything needs to be spot-on for the rice to seem like it belongs.  Leaving the rice out allows for a wider margin of error.  The Beefy 5-Layer Burrito doesn't knock you over with spectacular flavors, but texturally it is near perfect and at $1.29 delivers incredible value.

All of the flavors here work very well together, particular the beef and the beans.  Taco Bell was also wise not to "over-beef" this burrito.  There is just the right amount.  That said, it is still a very sizable meal for the price, and is easily my favorite Taco Bell burrito to date.

Item #28:  NACHOS & CHEESE W/CORN SALSA

The corn salsa served at Chipotle restaurants is certainly among my favorite condiments on Earth.  In perusing Taco Bell's website, I noted that Taco Bell also offered their side of Nachos with corn salsa.  I wasn't entirely sure what to expect, although I was pretty certain that it would not be on the level of the product offered at Chipotle.  I figured "what the hell," because I needed to cross it off my list.

The official Taco Bell website description:

"Roasted corn and pepper salsa, paired with crispy tortilla chips."

Price:  $1.49**

Taste:  7.0 (out of 10)

Value:  7.0 (out of 10)

Overall Score:  7.0 (out of 10)

This was without a doubt my most amusing checkout experience to date.  As previously mentioned, I dined in on this occasion.  I have been doing this pretty frequently of late and thus remembered tonight's cashier from previous visits to this Taco Bell location, so he was not a new employee.  He looked to be approximately college-aged with scruffy hair poking out from underneath his Taco Bell cap.  I ordered the Beefy 5-Layer Burrito first -- no problems there.

Next up:  a side of Nachos with Corn Salsa.  He hunted around the computer screen for about a full minute.  It was actually getting a little bit uncomfortable.  I was just about to say "Don't worry about it" and order something different, but he found it just in time.  (I guess that tells you all you need to know about how often a customer orders corn salsa at Taco Bell, and sadly, probably tells you all you need to know about said salsa's freshness.)

You will notice an asterisk on the $1.49 price above.  I am not sure whether it was a cashier error, or if one simply cannot get a side of Taco Bell nachos without nacho cheese, but I received cups of both nacho cheese AND corn salsa.  (See picture above.)  I was charged $0.30 for the corn salsa and $1.19 for the nachos and nacho cheese.  Which turned out to be quite a happy accident, because upon trying a chip dipped only in the corn salsa, the flavor was too bland for my liking.  There was a faintly sweet and roasted flavor that was definitely not unpleasant -- there just wasn't enough of it.

The other problem that I initially encountered was that the corn salsa had difficulty staying put on top of the chip.  The solution that I implemented was nothing short of genius** -- I dipped each chip in the nacho cheese first, then executed a follow-up dip in the corn salsa.  The resultant flavor was not exceptional, but it was certainly a huge improvement on the dipped-only-in-salsa flavor.  The other bonus was that the nacho cheese caused the corn salsa to adhere to the chips much more effectively.  The nacho cheese and corn salsa combo is a solid combination, but not a particularly remarkable one.

(**Actually, no genius was involved.)

**UPDATE:  Corn Salsa appears to have been discontinued as a menu offering.  It's probably for the best.**

As always, the receipt:

Peace out, loyal readers.  Stay tuned for the riveting conclusion to the Brownie Sandwich saga!